I have a few issues with Feminism if it looks at women's needs in isolation, when they are in a system that also involves men. Let me illustrate with a few examples. Person A is from one gender, Person B from the opposite gender.
#1. Imagine a hypothetical case where Person A is advocating for equal annual pay for their gender while their output is 1/10th of the pay of the opposite gender. Is that fair?
#2. Imagine a hypothetical case where Person A lives on average for 20 years in retirement, while Person B lives 5 years in retirement. Is it fair for Person B to contribute the same amount into a pension scheme than Person A, when their payout is 1/4? Person B is already suffering from 15 years less of life, yet they get hit again with subsidising the privileged.
#3. Imagine a hypothetical case where 60% of university graduates are of gender A, with only 40% of graduates are of gender B. Is it fair to choose candidates based on results only or do you take gender into consideration too?
Before I continue, I would like answers to 1, 2 and 3!
We mean the way that society has developed and which has given an unfair advantage to men - with the acknowledgement that the very same 'advantage' may also be harmful to men.
This is therefore not an advantage. And, if this 'advantage' confers some benefits to women, it is therefore not a disadvantage. You can't say it is both good and 'good' for men, but only bad and 'bad' for women.
That's what we mean by toxic masculinity. Not that being a man is in some way reprehensible.
The term itself is deliberately phrased to attack men. To think otherwise is naive. It is the verbal lexicon of hate. How would you feel if men started referring to 'disgusting femininity'? Words matter. Toxic words cause a divide between the genders. Is the term 'toxic masculinity' hate speech and should feminists therefore be no-platformed? Or has male-bashing become the new acceptable face of misandry?
An example of toxic masculinity I found on the web:
-That REAL men need to be strong and that showing emotion is a sign of weakness... unless it’s anger, that is considered okay.
Imagine how popular a movie is where the lead male character is a crumbling wreck, bursting into tears at the drop of a hat.
I can't stop giggling to myself just thinking about it! While I may hear that this should not be the case - trying to prove that toxic masculinity is bad - at the same time, you only have to look at the movies to see what is popular. The most "romantic" scene in the Titanic movie is where the guy is strong, freezing himself to death while she stays nicely dry on the floating debris. How would you feel if he was on the raft while she was freezing to death?
Feminism is the liberation of women and girls all over the world from the patriarchy and misogyny that continues to harm and oppress them as a class of people.
You can't advocate for the liberation of women from this 'harmful' misogyny while at the same time wanting to keep your raft. This misogyny comes from the same culture that likes a guy to be a 'gentleman', killing himself in the process.
I just had a little insight as I am writing this. When someone says toxic masculinity. they are in fact attacking men's behaviour, which is the result of how they have evolved. Is it fair to attack those who had no say in the matter? To illustrate, masculinity is an umbrella term to cover all traits of men. To then attack a subset of those traits (toxic masculinity) is to also attack a group of people who evolved to behave in that manner. The currently alive men had no say in their evolution. This cherry-picking and choosing of the traits you like and not the ones you don't like, is tantamount to abuse. Do you attack a person because their DNA gives them a certain skin colour? Then why attack someone for code in their DNA that gives them certain traits?
One last point. The ideology that surrounds this is in fact not what most women want. Having an intellectual framework that sounds nice and cosy does not match up with the evolved preferences of women. Women take more of the blame for the 'patriarchy' than men, since they are the ones who have mostly selected their mates based on dominance, resources and power. Women have chosen which DNA traits to propagate. Don't feed the beast if you don't want more of them! (I believe the portrayal of the patriarchy is a misrepresentation and a bunch of twaddle, but that is another argument.)
[Edit: Don't blame the women either, since they evolved too, like men. We are all hapless.]