When I was working my way through college, I was a musician on Bourbon Street. One of the band members had played in another band a few blocks deeper into the French Quarter so was able to give us some tips about people parading around pretending to be who they weren't. This was long before the days in which gender reassignment surgery was commonplace. There were those bio-males who actually made a convincing woman until you "got into something more comfortable." Thankfully, our senior member watched out for us until we learned how to detect the convincing masquerades. We also had to learn to not laugh at the less convincing charades. There is nothing quite so dramatic as a scorned queen. Trust me!
I actually had the chance to talk to someone who felt s/he was a victim of some disorder but back then we didn't know as much as we do now. I made it clear that I would talk to the person but nothing else. There was a lot of fear and lot of confusion in his/her head. I could not offer any advice at the time. However, I met my share of LGBTQ types. Most of them were trying to be what they knew they weren't but felt they should have been.
Today I see some small progress, but there are still pervs out there who abuse the situation. That is what bothers me more than anything else. Bee, you are right to be cautious. There is still no substitute for actually getting to know someone to find out whether you will have these nasty assaults. There is still a mean streak of homophobia out there in the world. A guy out at work MANY years ago - like, 40+ years - was fired due to a false accusation of making a sexual advance. I knew Pete and knew he wouldn't make a pass at some guy at work because I knew his partner at the time. Besides, the guy who claimed the advance just wasn't his type. But since I wasn't a witness to the event I couldn't help him. Made me forever not trust the guy who did that.
